Sunday, October 25, 2009

The Song of my Heart

As I sit here trying to type, I am listening to Mandisa sing "Broken Hallelujah". It is (right now), the song of my heart........ Here are the lyrics:

With my love and my sadness
I come before You Lord
My heart’s in a thousand pieces
Maybe even more

Yet I trust in this moment
You’re with me somehow
And You’ve always been faithful
So Lord even now

When all that I can sing
Is a broken hallelujah
When my only offering
Is shattered praise
Still a song of adoration
Will rise up from these ruins
I will worship You and give You thanks
Even when my only praise
Is a broken hallelujah

Oh Father, You have given
Much more than I deserve
And I have felt Your hand of blessing
On me at every turn

How could I doubt Your goodness
Your wisdom, Your grace
Oh Lord hear my heart
In this painful place


I lift my voice
Your Spirit moves
I raise my hands
I reach for You

Precious Lord,
You have broken my heart and it is Yours to break. You see, even though I do not understand all that You are doing, I know that You alone are God. So, I lift to You my broken hallelujah and thank You that You pick up all the pieces and turn them into something beauitful.

Friday, October 16, 2009


Recently, my oldest child and only son, turned 13. My first teenager! I find this a worthy occasion to reflect! I remember well finding out I was expecting my first child. I was nervous and excited! Also, I remember when he arrived. I had been in labor for over 23 hours when it was determined that he was going to arrive via C-section. At that point, I was exhausted and just ready for the whole thing to be over!

I remember tears of joy upon learning that our son had arrived safely! Then I promptly fell asleep to awaken in a small recovery area some time later. It took us a few days to actually decide what to name our bundle of joy! Josiah Benjamin Ferenczy has blessed us in so many ways. He has a huge responsibility as the oldest child and big brother to three girls! I try to remind him often that God knew he was just the guy for the job, otherwise He wouldn't have done that to him! : )

Thirteen years have flown by, but I remember those early days thinking, surely someone is going to show up to get him because I do not know how to do this mothering thing. Unfortunately, as the first child, he got the brunt of my inexperience as a parent, but all of the love as well. I can only pray that when all is said and done the love will outweigh all of the mistakes I have made or will make.

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

The Chronicles of Narnia

Last year, my husband and I read "The Chronicles of Narnia" to our children. I had never read the series myself, but have to admit, I enjoyed it as much (if not more than) the kids! One of the things I experienced as we read the series was a greater appreciation and even a deeper understanding of my God. I recently read a book called "The Heart of The Chronicles of Narnia: Knowing God Here By Finding Him There," by Thomas Williams. It was a fun read, as the author highlighted and dug into some of my favorite aspects of the original series, also pointing out how we can experience some deeper truths by allowing ourselves to delve into this magical land of Narnia.

For anyone who has never read the books, I highly recommend that you do. It will be well worth your time investment. If you've read them before, maybe as a child, I would recommend you read them again. The main reason I brought it up is a quote I want to share from the end of Williams' book, a thought provoking question:

"Unlike the Narnians, who can see, hear, and touch Aslan, we no longer have Jesus in tangible form. But in these stories Lewis shows us the first step in learning to love Christ. We can see the boundless scope of his love in his gifts. Thay's why Narnia is filled with the delights of creation. Everything God made is for our delight and joy. In the Chronicles Lewis holds this truth up to our face so we can't possibly miss it. Rather than asking the tired old question, "Why is there so much evil in the world?" Narnia forces us to answer another question: "Why is there so much good in the world?" We can account for evil in the fact of our free will and the fall. But if there is no God, how can we account for all the beauty, wonder, love, joy, and delight in the world?"